Self-esteem is what we believe and feel about ourselves and the way we value ourselves. Self-esteem may be built on our roles and relationships, our body image, and our feelings about health. Self-esteem can be based on the perceptions that other people have of us, as well as our own view of ourselves. Childhood, friends and family help us to learn about ourselves and who we are which contributes to our self-esteem as well as our own comparisons with others, life experiences and the things that we achieve. 

People who have high self-esteem tend to focus on their achievements and successes, while people who have low self-esteem tend to focus more on their failures.

If women going through menopause have low self-esteem, they are often more vulnerable to depressed feelings, anxious thoughts, increased health problems and are even more likely to experience more menopausal symptoms.

Improving self-esteem

Some ways to improve self-esteem include: 

• Challenging unreasonable expectations you may have of yourself 
• Taking time to do something you really want to do just for you, that is, to be SELF-ish 
• Join activities and/or courses that will make you feel good about yourself 
• Identify achievements and focus on these
• Keeping the things you don't think you are very good at, in perspective
• Making sure that the goals you set are reasonable and achievable

Take some time for yourself and review your lifestyle, roles and relationships. Understand and evaluate your situation as abusive relationships - physical, emotional, financial, mental and/or social - can lead to loss of self-esteem. When you hear yourself saying the words "I am not very good at that", or "I'm hopeless" or "Who would want me ..." then stop and challenge these statements. We are all good at something and have something to contribute that is worthwhile.

Remember, it is never too late to follow a dream.

Further resources

Books

Change Your Thinking
By Dr Sarah Edelman

Content updated 6 November, 2009